"Your pain cost you an unforgettable moment in time. But the resulting testimony is salvaging a lifetime for many. -Hart Ramsey"
Scripture: Matthew 5: 43-44 - 43 "You have heard that it was said, 'Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.' 44 But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you,
So many scriptures have taken on new meanings to me...God has personally given me a deeper understanding of Who He is and the understanding of my relationship with Him. No two people have the same personal relationship with God... Each relationship is younique to that individual.
Only God could have cause me to pray and intercede on behalf of those who took my child's life...especially when I was believing and depending on God to heal and make my family whole on this side of the living...
Only God could give me a heart of compassion and empathy for the predators and the victim...He has allowed me to walk in both shoes...The enemy has used people to cheer me on openly and hate on me behind closed doors...and that is okay with me...I do not take it personal...and I get it...
Until I really took the time to get to God and myself on a much deeper level...I was just going through the motions...But when my daughter died...I started putting "action" behind the words I was speaking...the words "I love you" didn't mean anything until God showed me what Love was and what it should look and feel like...then I had a greater appreciation and understanding of "love" ...
I didn't think all the grief that I had been carrying around on the inside...had given birth to this inner child that was full of rage and dying... the child within was releasing toxins poisons into my blood and it was killing me slowing...slowly through the outward outburst of rage that occasionally showed up at the most awkward time...it was slowly killing me through the hateful and venomous words that were in my heart and rolled off my lips with such ease when I became angry or worse...felt backed up into a corner...But I'm so Grateful that God Loved me so much that He overlooked my flaws and decided to walk me down Grace and Mercy Highway...showing me how He had kept me for such a time as now...
Because of His Love for me...how could I not have empathy for the ones that took my her life...how could I not pray for them and their mothers...My flesh may get weak at times BUT MY SPIRIT IS SOLID! So don't read my journal and feel sorry for me...because I don't.
I know Who I AM and I know WHOSE I AM...my Father's Daughter...An Anointing Queen covered in His Glory! Father God, I Thank You in advance for the "Vision and Purpose" You have ordained this Memoir for. May it reach ALL that need this "Radical Transparency" and may it Glorify Your Name. Not my will, But Your Will Be Done.
Giving You the Highest Praise! Singing Glory Hallelujah!
