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I’d always loved being outside. I didn’t care where, as long as I was in the fresh air and free. Free from responsibilities and commitments and, most importantly, men. I had no interest in getting close to another man. Not since the one I thought I loved almost destroyed me. Colin was different, but that didn’t mean he was safe. My ex was just as sweet and kind at first, too. But Colin had an ability to make me feel like I was special. Like I was important. Like nothing else mattered to him when I was around. It was overwhelming. Resisting him was harder with each kiss and each touch, but I had to keep him at a distance. He couldn’t hurt me if he couldn’t get close. It wasn’t enough for him. He wanted to get closer. Close enough to see the shadows. Close enough to see the scars. Close enough to heal me. I couldn’t handle close. Not when close always hurt.
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I’d always loved being outside. I didn’t care where, as long as I was in the fresh air and free. Free from responsibilities and commitments and, most importantly, men. I had no interest in getting close to another man. Not since the one I thought I loved almost destroyed me. Colin was different, but that didn’t mean he was safe. My ex was just as sweet and kind at first, too. But Colin had an ability to make me feel like I was special. Like I was important. Like nothing else mattered to him when I was around. It was overwhelming. Resisting him was harder with each kiss and each touch, but I had to keep him at a distance. He couldn’t hurt me if he couldn’t get close. It wasn’t enough for him. He wanted to get closer. Close enough to see the shadows. Close enough to see the scars. Close enough to heal me. I couldn’t handle close. Not when close always hurt.