Finding My Course

"It will tear at your heart." - Jim Murphy, athlete, author, coach

Behind her fierce mask as a professional golfer on the LPGA Tour, Tracy Hanson hid the trauma she had experienced as a young elite athlete and pushed herself to prove her worth through performance and perfection. But deep down, she was exhausted and full of pain.

In Finding My Course, Tracy finally tells the dramatic story of her life before, during, and after the harm done to her. To survive, she buried her emotions. She attached her value to her career as a pro golfer, even as she felt like a fraud while achieving success. Then, through friendships and therapy, Tracy began to unbury shame and self-hatred, and she discovered what her true worth was based on. The unconditional love of God.

• To athletes Tracy writes, "I wrote my story for you. You are a human being with dignity and choice. No coach or authority figure has the right to take that away from you."

• To parents and guardians she writes, "Most sexual abuse survivors know the person who assaulted them. Whether your child is still participating in sports or not, it is never too late to pursue an open dialogue about his or her sport experiences."

• To coaches she writes, "In the midst of [the pressure to succeed], it is still your responsibility to provide an environment that is safe."

Finding My Course is a very personal memoir about a world-class athlete's journey from pain to purpose. A journey open to all who have experienced trauma, emotional abandonment, or pressure to perform.

In his Foreword, veteran elite athlete chaplain the Rt. Rev. Canon Dr. John Ashley Null says, "Tracy tells her story with heart-breaking honesty, page-turning prose, and hard-won wisdom."