Things my mother taught me
In Things My Mother Taught Me, a diverse range of Australian identities each reflect on the role that their mother has played in shaping them into the people they are today.
With Mother’s Day (Sunday 8 May) just around the corner, our staff have reflected on what their own mothers have taught them.
‘When I was growing up my mum made her own preserves from home-grown fruit, most of our clothes were hand-made, and we never had store-bought biscuits in the house. Mum even made her own audiobooks – sitting up late at night with a tape recorder, books, and a bell to ring so we knew when to turn the page. As a child I craved all the slick, plastic, shop-bought goodies my friends enjoyed in abundance, but as an adult I’ve realised the deep pleasure that can be had from creating something from scratch. I’m now famous for my strawberry jam, I’m gradually becoming a more confident seamstress, and I regularly bring home-baked biscuits into work. My mum taught me that the value of items that have been created with time and love far outstrips anything you can buy in a shop.’
– Lian Hingee
‘From as early an age as I can remember my mum taught me that words, art and music were things to be embraced – some of my earliest memories involve dragging her around our local bookstore to stock up on Goosebumps and Famous Five novels, and she always said how her regret at not learning music was something she refused to pass on. It’s only something I’ve realised fairly recently, but raising a son in a country town in the early 90s must have come with all sorts of expectations around how 'real men’ act. So for my parents to teach me that it was okay to like writing and drawing and playing the piano more than sport or fishing was, I think, more of a radical act than I ever gave them credit for.‘
– Alan Vaarwerk
'Among the many, many things my mother taught me – how to cook, how to ride horses, how to be a devoted pet owner, how to love books, how to barrack for a football team that never wins, how to care for someone who is ill or elderly, how to be a good person, essentially – there remains one thing that is still a work-in-progress for her: teaching me how to dress. My mother has always been incredibly stylish. She is very tall, and when she was younger, she was a model. Clothes look great on her, and she dresses bright and bold, delighting in quirky shoes, patterned leggings, long sweeping coats, and amazing boots.’
‘I did not inherit her skills at shopping, or knowing how to style myself, and it is something she has spent a lifetime trying to nurture and encourage. We are roughly the same size in clothing and shoes, so every time I go home to visit her, I also visit what my sister and I affectionately call The Shop of Mum – which is her wardrobe of beautiful clothes. She will call me into her bedroom and say, 'I have some things for you’, and then dress me in all manner of lovely cardigans and tops and jeans. Pretty much any time someone has complimented me on an item of clothing in my life, it has come from my mother.‘
– Nina Kenwood
'My mum has taught me how to make chocolate cakes and create gardens in shoeboxes, how to fold towels and slice onions, how to be strong and not take shit from other people. She has encouraged me to wear comfortable clothes and sensible shoes, and to make friends welcome in my home. She has shown me that fresh flowers can lift a place in unexpected ways, that tradition and family are important, that respect is more than simply good manners, that marriage can work and that having kids are a joy. And, my mum has taught me that parenthood never ends. She continues to teach by example – thank goodness!’
– Chris Gordon
‘My mother taught me to love language. Before I could read on my own, she was forthcoming with definitions of words that were unfamiliar to me, but after I learned to read by myself, she became afflicted with a terrible ignorance. After that, if I encountered an unknown word mum would insist that I look it up in the dictionary. At first this involved us looking up words together, but soon enough I was on my own. If I was comfortable on the sofa and engrossed in the plot of my book, I would try to catch her off guard with my query so that she would accidentally tell me the definition and I could get back to my book more quickly. Regrettably, this never worked. Then, depending on how many pointless queries I had already made that day and therefore how many times I had already consulted the dictionary, I might resort to begging her to tell me. Again, this never worked.’
‘Once she knew I could do it myself, she never gave in and my curiosity was impossible to ignore, so I would inevitably drag myself to the dictionary. Then I would spend a good five minutes not only getting to grips with whatever word had driven me there in the first place, but also being amused by other words I found nearby. As soon as I had looked up the word for myself, my mother would be miraculously ready to discuss all the different ways the word could be used and in what contexts I might find it again. Cunning, mother, very cunning. Did I mention that she is a teacher?!’
– Elke Power
‘One of the most important things my mother passed onto me is a deep love and respect for animals, and their complexities. Like her, I stopped eating meat in my teen years and I try to do whatever I can to support organisations working to improve animal welfare. On a lighter note, she also taught me all the words to several of Bryan Adams’ (terrible/awesome) songs – much to my partner’s distress.‘
– Bronte Coates
