George Washington is Cash Money: A No-Bullshit Guide to the United Myths of America

PREPARE TO BE BEAKED BY THE MAJESTIC EAGLE OF HISTORY

Most of us are familiar with the greatest hits and legendary heroes of US history. In George Washington Is Cash Money, Cory O'Brien, author of Zeus Grants Stupid Wishes, does away with the pomp and circumstance and calls America’s history what it is- one long, violent soap opera. In his signature clever, crude, and cuss-ridden style, O'Brien reminds us that-

Teddy Roosevelt stopped bullets with his manly chest

Harriet Tubman avoided danger by having prophetic seizures.

Joseph Smith invented Mormonism by staring into a hat full of rocks.

Billy the Kid was finally defeated by the smell of fresh bacon.

And there’s plenty more Star Spangled stupidity where that came from.