I SHOULD HAVE STAYED IN BED

Three weeks ago I, Rachel Bond, inherited a bed-and-breakfast. In Alaska. Just this morning I was in my warm bed in LA but now here I am, up north-and this is, like, nosebleed north-sorting it all out. So-

PROS-

1. Bears and wolves and moose can’t be any worse than LA guys.

2. You’ve heard of starving artists? I’m about to faint. So it’s probably time for a change.

3. My good friend Kellan-you’ll like him, unlike me, he’s cool under pressure-suddenly has this animal sexiness I’ve never even seen before.

CONS-

1. ALASKA.

2. The house chef can’t cook, and the guide can’t read a map.

3. Kellan’s sudden hotness is getting very hard to ignore.

4. I just got hit by lightning.

And I’m not sure if this is a pro or a con just yet, but since that lightning bolt, I can see through everything. As in completely transparent. That was before things started to get really weird…